The 7th Commandment: Guarding the Covenant of Marriage
The 7th Commandment: Guarding the Covenant of Marriage
There are few things in life more sacred—or more under attack—than marriage.
When I read the words of Exodus 20:14, “You shall not commit adultery,” I don’t hear a cold command from a distant God—I hear a loving Father protecting something He designed to be holy.
Marriage is not a contract; it’s a covenant. It’s not a deal between two people—it’s a divine union sealed before God Himself. And when we understand that, this commandment stops feeling like restriction and starts sounding like protection.
The Sacred Covenant of Marriage
From the beginning, God created marriage as the most intimate human relationship. Genesis 2:24 says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
That word “joined” doesn’t mean glued—it means fused. It’s two lives becoming one, under one purpose, guided by one Spirit.
God takes this covenant seriously. Malachi 2:14–15 paints a sobering picture of His heart when it says, “The Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth… guard your heart and do not be unfaithful.”
And Jesus reaffirmed this in Matthew 19:6 when He said, “What God has joined together, let no one separate.”
This tells me that fidelity isn’t just about avoiding adultery—it’s about protecting intimacy. It’s about honoring the vows you made in front of God, your spouse, and your community.
Jesus’ Teachings on Adultery
Jesus took this commandment and raised the bar.
In Matthew 5:27–28, He said, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Jesus was saying something radical: adultery doesn’t begin in the bedroom—it begins in the heart.
It starts with a glance that lingers too long. A text that crosses the line. A fantasy that goes unchecked.
Jesus wasn’t condemning attraction—He was confronting intention. He was warning us that if we don’t guard our hearts, we’ll lose our footing.
Practical Ways to Protect Our Marriages
Over the years—both as a pastor and as a husband—I’ve learned that healthy marriages don’t happen by accident.They’re built intentionally, brick by brick, boundary by boundary.
Here are some ways I’ve learned (and continue to practice) to protect the covenant God entrusted to us:
1. Prioritize Your Partner
Your spouse should never feel like they’re competing with your career, ministry, or phone. Make your marriage a daily priority. Schedule time together. Speak life into one another. Choose connection over convenience.
When I make time for my wife, I’m not just protecting my marriage—I’m honoring my God.
2. Build Boundaries Before Breaking Trust
Temptation doesn’t announce itself—it sneaks in quietly. That’s why we have to build boundaries before temptation breaks trust.
Know your limits. Avoid situations that could lead to compromise. Accountability isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom.
Boundaries don’t restrict love—they protect it.
3. Eliminate Enticements
In a world saturated with media and messages that normalize impurity, we must be vigilant about what we allow into our hearts and homes.
2 Corinthians 10:5 tells us to “take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ.” That means we don’t just manage our thoughts—we master them under the authority of God’s Word.
What you feed will grow. Starve lust. Feed love.
4. Trust Your Spouse’s Discernment
If your spouse senses something is off—listen. Don’t dismiss their discernment.
Your spouse is your teammate, not your enemy. Mutual accountability builds mutual trust.
When one of us feels uneasy, we talk it out, pray it out, and bring it into the light—because sin thrives in secrecy, but it dies in honesty.
5. Seek Accountability
We all need someone who can look us in the eye and ask the hard questions.
James 5:16 says, “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.”
Healing requires humility. Find a trusted friend or mentor of the same gender who can hold you accountable and encourage you to walk in purity.
A Message of Grace and Restoration
Now let me say this clearly: if you’ve already fallen, there’s still hope.
The same Jesus who said, “Go and sin no more,” also said, “Neither do I condemn you.” (John 8:11)
He didn’t condone her sin, but He didn’t cancel her story either. He offered grace and truth. Forgiveness and freedom.
No matter how far you’ve drifted, God’s grace can bring you home. You can’t rewrite the past, but with His help, you can redeem the future.
Conclusion: Guard the Covenant, Embrace the Grace
The 7th Commandment isn’t just about saying “no” to adultery—it’s about saying “yes” to covenant faithfulness. It’s an invitation to guard what’s sacred, honor what’s holy, and reflect the love of Christ in our relationships.
If your marriage is strong—praise God! Keep watering it with prayer, time, and affection.
If your marriage is struggling—don’t give up. God specializes in restoration.
And if you’ve been wounded by betrayal—know this: healing is possible, and you don’t have to walk through it alone.
I’d love to talk with you, pray with you, or point you toward resources that can help you rebuild hope and restore trust.
You can reach me directly at pastorgreg@alpinebethel.org.
Because at the end of the day, God’s not just trying to protect marriages—He’s trying to protect hearts. And when we honor His covenant, we experience the fullness of His blessing.
- Greg
